Frank Zappa quotes

A mind is like a parachute. It doesn't work if it is not …A mind is like a parachute. It doesn't work if it is not open.

Short Witty Humor Mind

If you end up with a boring miserable life because you listened to your mom, your dad, your …If you end up with a boring miserable life because you listened to your mom, your dad, your teacher, your priest, or some guy on television telling you how to do your shit, then you deserve it.

Life Funny

Without music to decorate it, time is just a bunch of boring production deadlines or dates by which …Without music to decorate it, time is just a bunch of boring production deadlines or dates by which bills must be paid.

Music Time

Interviewer: 'So Frank, you have long hair. Does that make you a woman?', Frank Zappa: 'You have a …Interviewer: 'So Frank, you have long hair. Does that make you a woman?', Frank Zappa: 'You have a wooden leg. Does that make you a table?'

Humor

Without deviation from the norm, progress is not …Without deviation from the norm, progress is not possible.

Philosophy

If you want to get laid, go to college. If you want an education, go to the …If you want to get laid, go to college. If you want an education, go to the library.

Humor Education

Information is not knowledge. Knowledge is not wisdom. Wisdom is not truth. Truth is not beauty. …Information is not knowledge. Knowledge is not wisdom. Wisdom is not truth. Truth is not beauty. Beauty is not love. Love is not music. Music is THE BEST.

Beauty Love Music Truth

There is more stupidity than hydrogen in the universe, and it has a longer shelf …There is more stupidity than hydrogen in the universe, and it has a longer shelf life.

Human nature Humor Universe

I never set out to be weird. It was always other people who called me …I never set out to be weird. It was always other people who called me weird.

Short People

Definition of rock journalism: People who can't write, doing interviews with people who can't …Definition of rock journalism: People who can't write, doing interviews with people who can't think, in order to prepare articles for people who can't read.

Music Humor Writing

A drug is not bad. A drug is a chemical compound. The problem comes in when people who take drugs …A drug is not bad. A drug is a chemical compound. The problem comes in when people who take drugs treat them like a license to behave like an asshole.

Problems

My best advice to anyone who wants to raise a happy, mentally healthy child is: Keep him or her as …My best advice to anyone who wants to raise a happy, mentally healthy child is: Keep him or her as far away from a church as you can.

Religion Children Advice



Contents Menu

  1. All Frank Zappa quotes




All Frank Zappa quotes


So many books, so little …So many books, so little time.

Book Short Time

Jazz isn't dead. It just smells …Jazz isn't dead. It just smells funny.

Humor Music